How politically correct is this world becoming when people are complaining about a baseball term that’s been around longer than most of us have been alive?
Any of you get word of this nonsense?
PETA, officially the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, wants the term “bullpen” (where all of the pitchers sit and warm before and during games) to be replaced with the term, “arm barn.”
Why, you ask?
Well apparently it’s offensive, and insensitive to bulls. The bullpen is where cattle go to hang out before they meet their death to be butchered and put in our grocery stores so we can devour them once they’ve been cooked to perfection. I should probably mention that I very much stand by actress Mary Steenburgen’s line in the film, “Did You Hear About The Morgans?” when she gives her definition of PETA, “People for Eating Tasty Animals.”
Newsflash PETA, they’re animals. They can’t read, they have no sensitivity to words. And furthermore, they don’t even know what baseball is. Are we getting to a point in our culture where we must be so politically correct that we must not offend animals? What a bunch of bologna. Oh, sorry, was that offensive to all of the animals used to make the delicious deli meat?
I’ve heard of a lot of – if I may say directly – stupid stuff, but this has got to be one of the most ridiculously beyond stupid things I’ve heard in a while. Seriously, what’s next? The removal of “hot dogs” because dogs spend time outside in the heat of summer and that’s somehow offensive? Or because some dogs don’t experience extremely hot temperatures and it’s offensive to basically every dog in Alaska and Northern Canada? God forbid if we upset those St. Bernards and Newfoundlands.
The people at PETA, whose overall mission is admirable, clearly didn’t think this one through. Arm barn? Really? For all we know that’ll be insensitive to chickens because the barn is where they live before they’re harvested to make chicken wings.
First of all, there’s no need whatsoever to change the name of the bullpen, but if we must – and I’m really hoping Baseball Commissioner Rob Manfred is realistic in any response he may give – I’m pretty sure we can do a whole lot better than arm barn. How about the “pitchers’ pen,” the “battery bench,” or the “warmup box?” All three of these are just as awful because, again, there’s no need to change the name of the bullpen, but still, better than arm barn.
I wonder if PETA wants to do away with team names as well? After all, we don’t want any animals to be portrayed as fierce competitors in regard to team nicknames when in reality they might be kind and gentle creatures – especially those cute little birds. Does this mean we may have to explore renaming the Diamondbacks, Orioles, Cubs, Tigers, Marlins, Cardinals, Rays and Blue Jays?
Or maybe PETA will go on a rant and demand MLB and other professional sports provide only vegan menus. Nothing says America’s pastime like beer and that plant-based tofu meat stick in a bun. (That’s a safety term for hot dog.)
Baseballs themselves are made with cow and horse hide. What does PETA have to say about that? With something as ridiculous as their “bullpen” request, maybe they’ll try really hard to change the balls to a faux leather.
This is sadly more than likely going to spark other nondescript humans out there that are easily offended or want some kind of over-the-top change to take action.
Maybe the words to “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” are next? “Buy me some peanuts and crackerjacks” might have to be rewritten because someone at the ballpark might have a peanut allergy – and that’s just mean to have those words in a song. And singing, “If they don’t win, it’s a shame,” isn’t good for a player’s morale because those words could mean you’re an ultimate failure if you lose a game.
PETA, leave baseball alone. You worry about hitting a home run with the actual ethical treatment of animals, while the rest of us sit back and enjoy actual home runs being hit “at the ol’ ball-game.”
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