Apparently Angel Luis Rivera Aponte, aka Miguel Baez Zapata, didn’t get the memo about how he’s supposed to be hiding “in the shadows” because of President Trump.
On Tuesday, this Dominican national was at the Division of Motor Vehicles in Manchester, N.H., trying to get himself a driver’s license, claiming to be from Manchester, instead of Lawrence, where he’s really from (surprise, surprise).
Alas for Mr. Aponte or Zapata, the New Hampshire State Police arrived. According to the press release, the state police, with a little help from Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), “were able to confirm that the documents he presented were fraudulent.”
Hey, he was just forging the documents Americans can’t be bothered to counterfeit.
The charge: unsworn falsification and tampering with public records.
One down, 20 million or so to go.
I got that N.H. State Police news release yesterday just after I had read yet another sob story about the reign of terror that the Trump administration is allegedly unleashing on America.
The New York Times headline: “Immigrants Hide, Fearing Capture on ‘Any Corner.’ ”
If only the story had been posted a day earlier — in Spanish — perhaps Aponte or Zapata or whatever his real name is could have avoided spending the night in the Hillsborough County Jail.
But the Times story is only one of an emerging genre of, ahem, news about Trump’s alleged outrages. Perhaps you heard the latest on school bathrooms, and how, in the words of The Washington Post, “the Trump administration plans to roll back protections for transgender students.”
Roll back protections — let me translate that into English for you. Henceforward, it will be left to the states to decide whether high-school football players will be allowed to loiter in girls’ bathrooms.
And we’re barely five weeks into the Trump administration. Stand by for more reports from “the shadows” and elsewhere. It’s never about what has actually happened, only what some pablum-puking Democrat “fears” will happen.
Next, we will be told, some gender-fluid Navy personnel are refusing to re-enlist because they “fear” Trump and his brutish defense secretary named “Mad Dog” will prohibit them from wearing dresses while on submarine duty.
Isn’t it odd that just as this torrent of tragic tall tales begins, the media’s leading proponents of fake news are starting campaigns to demonstrate their commitment to … not lying.
From the Globe (“Truth Matters”) to the Times (“The Truth”) to The Washington Post (“Democracy Dies in Darkness”), and my favorite, CBS (“Real News”). Yes, CBS, which ran the “fake but accurate” story about George W. Bush’s National Guard service, is now proclaiming itself purer than, I don’t know, Brian Williams or Mike Barnicle.
As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The louder he spoke of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.”
Emerson was onto something — I fear.
Order Howie’s new book, “Kennedy Babylon,” at his website, howiecarrshow.com.
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